Way back in 2016, I was struggling with the world. Random shootings, not-so-random killings, mean-spirited hearts, a ridiculously ugly political season, poverty I can’t undo and pain we seem to ignore. (Alas, I am not sure anything is much different today.) But it felt a bit much and I felt myself being dragged down.
I needed time to heal and to reassess, to escape from it all and protect my heart and family. Not only was the world in rough shape, but I was in rough shape, too, having had some of my journalistic articles on third party sites go big and viral. And, while proud of those articles and the conversation they created it, they also resulted in the subsequent threats and angry people on the Interwebs. So. I wrestled with the world.
I want to be the sort of person that makes a difference. I want to be the sort of person that takes responsibility. I want to be the sort of person who takes actions. I want to be the sort of person who controls her outlook on life rather than have life control her outlook. After wanting to be, I decided to be. And I sent an email.
One dark night, in the middle of the night I was contemplating life and my to-do list, as I usually do. I was praying about my priorities and coming up with ideas to live the good life, always striving. Suddenly, I remembered an event I helped with in our old town: Cinderella’s Closet. It was fun and it seemed easy enough to plan, yet it seemed like an opportunity to reach people here in my own community. Not seas away (which I also believe in), but five miles down the road.
I became so excited IÂ knew there was no going back to sleep. In typical fashion, I grew impatient, enthusiasm making my heart rate accelerate. IÂ didn’t think a single thing through and pulled out my phone. I emailed the pastor at my very new church (we weren’t even members yet) about how I thought we should bring Cinderella’s Closet to this area.
No research. No data collection. Just pure compulsion.
Would I do it again?
Cinderella’s Closet helps ladies who can’t afford to attend prom. Taking in donated formal dresses, shoes, accessories and purses, working with local area high school guidance counselors, there is a day of “shopping.”
Deserving high school girls with a need come in, are given a personal attendant, can try on anything they want, choose a dress, have alterations done on site, pick shoes and accessories, and they leave completely outfitted for their prom, no charge. The Closet even provided good food to promote fellowship and an opportunity to commune.
But I had a fair number of naysayers. One older man in the church breathed down his nose, looked at me, and said sarcastically, “Ah, yes, every girl’s inalienable right to attend her prom. Just what they need.” And I get that feeling. Many of these girls need better opportunities in life total, not just one night.
But sometimes all we can do to show love to the world is one tiny little thing – after all, as I realized in my midnight struggles with the world, I can’t help all these girls get all the opportunities they need but I could work to give them one night of dreams where what they have (or don’t) doesn’t matter at all. I could work to treat them to one day where they feel overwhelming love, where they see that everyone in the room believes they are a princess, where they understand in a real way that they are worthy.
When I volunteered with this event for the first time in Chapel Hill, what I remembered after was not the sequins and glitter. It was the conversations with two quiet girls who seemed overwhelmed but startled me with their determined visions for their lives. They were motivated. They believed the world was their oyster and they were out to take it. They had plans and they, while aware of the obstacles in front of them, were moving forward. They were inspirational.
I think as humans we can start small, and that we do ourselves a disservice by assuming we need to go large or go home. We can actually make big impacts by doing what we can do well and with a gracious heart. For example, I can give one bridesmaids dress collecting dust to help a girl have a night she will always remember. We can’t change the world all at once (that’s the job of the Big Guy/Gal) but instead of hanging our heads in defeat and thinking dark thoughts at midnight, we can get out and do what we can.
Starting a new ministry organization was not easy. I was scared, confused, overwhelmed, and uneducated about the process. I felt competitive feelings creeping in as I desired success and, as with us humans, frequently had to check my own ego. During my three years of running it (through its initial conception and kick off and two years of shopping events), there were so many twists, turns, and dramatic phone calls I can’t even recall them all now.
But yes, I would definitely do it again.
Today, we don’t live in the beautiful city where I launched the ministry. But the two women who stood by my side the day I suggested this organization and said, “yes,” who held my hand and listened to my calls, who believed in me and saw what this organization can be, are keeping Cinderella’s Closet in Wilmington and they continue to make it bigger and better. It is with nostalgia, gratitude and gratefulness that I watch from afar now what the ministry is able to do.
Now that I am years away from all of that hard work, I can reflect back. And the overall lesson that I always want to remember is that God can come out of nowhere to remind us that it is possible to take frustration at a world gone awry and become the person who takes action. And that it doesn’t have to be life-altering or world-changing. It can start small. Because, you never know, there may be just one person down the road from us, that we haven’t even seen, that our small action will mean everything to. We just have to open our hearts to the possibilities and the callings.
If you are local and want to help Cinderella’s Closet-Wilmington I encourage you to like the Facebook page. If you want to start an organization of your own in your community, visit the Cinderella’s Closet national website.
BOLD: (defined)
not hesitating or fearful in the face of actual or possible danger or rebuff; courageous and daring; not hesitating to break the rules of propriety; necessitating courage and daring; challenging; beyond the usual limits of conventional thought or action; imaginative
THE BOLD LIFE CHALLENGE:
I designed this challenge to push myself outside of my comfort zone. Adventure doesn’t have to be overseas, it can be in our own backyards.
I wanted to force myself to try new things, to learn to embrace my life, to take a situation where I was feeling lonely and force a new perspective. There is way too much fun, adventure, laughter and good people in the world for me to feel sad.
There is only one goal to this challenge: to live life BOLDLY. To live with courage, imagination, and to live outside conventional action. It is here life expands.